Dieting is Like Your Bad Ex

SummerBody Image, Body Positivity, Self-Love Comments

I recently read that we are more afraid of uncertainty than we are of death.

In other words, feeling out of control and not knowing exactly what is going to happen to us is the scariest thing to sit with.  

This is exactly why loosening your reigns around food and surrendering control is one of the hardest things to do. Because of diet culture and the fatphobic world we live in, we fear what’s going to happen.

We have no reference point for what life is like without dieting/fixating on our body, so we’re relying on all of the lies diet culture has taught us: that we can’t trust ourselves, that we’ll be miserable if we accept our body, etc.

We are trying to navigate a whole new way of being and that is a hell of a lot of fear and uncertainty to sit with.

I wish I had a crystal ball and could tell you that everything is going to be OK and will work out for the best.

But, I don’t. So, if you’re struggling with that uncertainty, then I’d like to give you a helpful metaphor that you can relate to.

Think of it this way: Dieting is your bad ex.

We’ve all been in a relationship at some point in our lives where the other person treated us terribly, but we couldn’t stop crawling back to them.

…we couldn’t stop texting them or looking at what they were up to on social media.
…we thought about them non-stop.
…we lost so many hours obsessing over what they were doing or whether they would call us back.
…we gave them a hundred chances to change, but it was always the same BS.
…we thought that perhaps we were doing something wrong, so we tried to change.

There was a glimmer of hope that kept pulling us back because, “maybe, just maybe, this time will be different.”

And even though there were moments where we thought, “this could all work out,” they had a fabulous way of always making us feel like garbage left outside in the summer heat.

There was something about them that gave us a sense of security that made it so hard for us to let go, even though they kept wounding our heart.

Does this sound familiar yet?

Dieting is your bad ex.

Eventually, we get to a point where we cannot take one more scar on our heart. We know they are terrible for us and we cannot take one more let down.

So, we break it off. For good.

…our friends rally around us and remind us that we deserve better.
…we delete their social media from our feed.
…we remove everything in our house that reminds us of them.
…we take their number off our phone.
…we reach out to our friends when we feel that pull to call them.

And it might hurt like hell, but eventually if feels SO DAMN GOOD. We realize a huge emotional weight has been lifted.

We realize they could never give us the love we deserve.

Even though the decision was filled with trepidation, tears and emotions, we knew it was the best thing we could have done for ourselves.

We finally feel free.  

Dieting is your bad ex.

It’s time to break things off. For good.

…delete everything that reminds you of dieting from your feed.
…remove everything that reminds you of dieting from your house.
…reach out for support when you feel pulled to give it another go.
…follow body positive people who can remind you why you made the right choice.
​​…know you are not alone in this.

Walking away from this will set you free.

You are going to be SO MUCH better off.

You don’t need that bullshit in your life. It’s toxic and it’s gotta go.

Imagine what would be possible if you didn’t have that burden to carry?

What would you gain? Imagine that. Hold that vision close and let that guide you.

Because your future will be so much better.

Just like it was when you finally broke it off with the bad ex.