Overcoming body shame requires a radical shift in thinking that is contrary to the majority of messages we receive from our ‘bangin’ bod’ obsessed culture.
Sidenote: everything that is wrong with this culture is captured in the phrase bangin’ bod. Dissect at your own discretion.
As I talk about in depth in my upcoming book (coming soon…weeeeeee!!!!), having positive body image hinges on the fundamental belief that you love yourself unconditionally.
If you’re like me, you likely spent a couple decades with your self-love hinging on something external – fitting into a pair of skinny jeans, whether or not you were able to hit a caloric deficit, your ability to give some Instagram dude named @L1vesinmomsbasement a boner with your selfie.
You bought into the bullshit idea that you’re not worthy until you meet certain conditions. You MUST kick this belief to the curb (or at least begin tapping it to the curb) to start the process of having a better body image.
Self-love – feeling like you’re enough as you are – can only exist without conditions.
I see far too many women hanging on to their ‘bangin bod’ fantasy and not allowing themselves to even attempt to like themselves as they are.
You cannot have self-love if you’re putting parameters around the way you feel about yourself.
Wanting to love yourself unconditionally is the fundamental first step of having good body image.
Once you’ve made that your intention, you can start to move forward and actually work towards embodying self-love. This is where you start to choose actions that reflect your choice for unconditional self-love.
And this is where I see women remaining trapped in body shame. They like the idea of unconditional love for yourself, but won’t take the actions that support it.
Ask yourself, what conditions are you putting on yourself?
…do you still have pants in your closet that make you feel crappy? Get new ones!
…are you trolling around podcasts and blogs looking for the missing nutrient to help you lose weight? Stop!
…secretly weighing yourself? Oh hell no!
…are you still following people on social media that post before and after pics? Unfollow!
Girl let me tell you that you MUST get rid of anything that is keeping your ‘bangin bod’ fantasy alive.
I know this hurts, but think of it as a big band-aid being ripped off so you can heal!
Embodying unconditional self-love happens over time – if you’ve been denying yourself feelings of ‘enoughness’ for more than half your life, then it’s going to take time to completely own it.
But if you’re courageously taking action to support your decision to love yourself unconditionally, then embodiment will happen.