Has this ever happened to you?
You have a horrible day at work because your boss made you stay late to fill out an excel spreadsheet that you can file under ‘make-work project’… more like ‘make-me-want-to-stab-myself-in-the-eye-with-a-pen-project.’ (gawd, I don’t miss those!)
You curse at the hippie/hipster (you’re not really sure anymore…because, beards) taking his sweet-ass time to cross the road and have a meltdown at the fact that the dry cleaner was closed so now you have nothing to wear tomorrow.
You arrive home late, flustered and now have to deal with the 843 things that have to be done before you can fall asleep. You shovel something in your mouth for dinner and later can’t recall if that was even human food.
When you finally sit down, you feel the urge to inhale the Girl Guide cookies in the cupboard, so you sit on your hands and try to wait it out. You tell yourself, “don’t do it! You’ve been so ‘good’ all week.”
After what feels like forever (but was actually one commerical break), you can no longer resist those sweet GG cookies calling your name.
You have a cookie and think, “well, I already had one so I might as well eat the entire row.” Nom nom. Sooooo goooood….
Time elapse: 5 minutes.
F-Me. You feel a wash of guilt flood over you, feeling so stupid for turning to food once again and think about how you’re going to repent your sins tomorrow by eating water for breakfast and busting out your FitBit to walk 32,457 extra steps.
You wake up the next day hating yourself and feeling gross when you try to get dressed. So you decide to eat salmon and asparagus (more filling than water) and bust your ass at the gym because you feel so horrible.
WHY CAN’T I CONTROL MYSELF?!?! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!?!
Most people would tell you to remove the cookies from your house to prevent this situation. If you’re like me, not buying the cookies would do nothing except cause a Girl Guide to cry for not meeting her quota outside the grocery store.
You and I both know that if you don’t have the Girl Guide cookies, you’ll find something…anything…to soothe your stress.
Let me tell you the one thing you actually need to remove from this situation: Guilt.
Guilt is the nasty little virus that causes your self-perception to plummet every time you decide to eat those cookies after a rough day at work.
Guilt is why one bite is never enough.
Guilt is the reason you declare yourself a failure, throw in the towel and shower yourself in more cookies covered in promises to ‘start over tomorrow’.
Guilt is what keeps you crawling back to your FitBit to feel better about yourself.
Guilt and shame don’t motivate.
They rip away your self-control and cause your self-hate to skyrocket.
Rid yourself of the guilt and food loses its power over you.
I know, I know..easier said than done.
Next time, I’m going to tell you my top 5 ways for dealing with guilt.
In the meantime, you know my motto…eat the cookies and move the hell on.
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To quote one of my favorite pins, I love you with all my butt. I would say with all my heart, but my butt is bigger. I heard you on the Half Size Me podcast and as soon as I got to work, I signed up for you mailing list. Thank you so much for your blog and this post.
AH I LOVE IT!! I may have to borrow that statement… and I love you with all my butt back!